Week 17: Make A Plan, Man.

Weekly Digital Detox Reflections

No, this is not the same picture from last week.

Greetings lovely readers! Welcome to week 17 of my weekly digital detox reflections. It’s been a few weeks since I gave everyone a rundown of my detox routine. So for all you newcomers, here it is.

Every weekday, when I get home from work, I put my phone in a designated spot and treat it like a landline. It stays in one spot and I do my best not to touch it. On top of that, at 6 PM every evening, all screens in the house get turned off. Once a week, I spend my day working in complete silence. No streaming music, audiobooks, or podcasts. I drive all day for work so this is usually my biggest challenge. When the weekend comes, I again, treat my phone like a landline as best I can. I do have windows of time where I allow myself to write, but these windows are tight 30 minutes to an hour and then we’re back to screens off or away. I then use these reflections to communicate what I think about while not distracted by digital technology. I hope they serve as examples of what can be achieved when disconnected.

Because of my job, and life in general, digital detoxing is a constant. We all know how completely inundated we are with digital technology. My goal is to one day be so disconnected from digital technology that I can truly say I am a digital minimalist, but right now detoxes are the best I can do.

Progress Report

On the digital front, progress was made just by getting back into my routine. On the writing front, something great has happened. Nothing drastic, but great nonetheless. I’ve come to a point where I no longer worry about whether what I have to write is worth reading. I no longer struggle with the confidence to publish what I’ve written. I’ve learned to embrace the fact that for whatever reason, I feel compelled to write. About God, scripture, modernity, digital dependence, music, whatever I think is worth writing about. The world needs men with calloused hands who are as capable with a pen as they are an axe. I aim to be such a man.

Where My Thoughts Have Been

“When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things.”

‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭13‬:‭11‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Children live passive lives. They must accept and adjust to the world they were born into. They are dressed in clothes they do not choose, eat food they are given, and go where their parents take them. In this passive phase of life, children observe and embody the habits and routines set forth for them. This is good, proper, and fruitful when parents are prayerfully and mindfully engaged. Yet at some point, children must put this life of passivity behind them, and become active in their pursuit of Holiness. For boys to become men, they must put away the things that keep them passive and immature. They must learn to cast a vision, make plans, and work to become men of God who continue to pursue Him no matter how He inevitably changes or altogether throws out our plans.

Cast A Vision

I’ll be honest, I don't love the phrase “cast a vision”. It’s a bit too lofty. On the other hand, “goal-setting” isn’t lofty enough. So we’ll go with cast a vision. One indication that a boy is becoming a man is he has started to look at his life as a whole and is making decisions about what he wants. Better yet, through prayer, Christian upbringing, and church community, he is being led by God’s vision for his life. He decides he wants a wife and some children. He knows what job he wants and why. Great. Now go one step further. He no only wants a wife, he wants a strong Christian marriage and children who will grow to love the Lord. He wants a job that is more than just a paycheck and benefits. The work he is doing should have meaning behind it. He wants his family to have a community. He wants them to be physically, emotionally, and spiritually healthy. He wants his family, friends, and everyone in his sphere of influence to be centered around Jesus. Contemplating such things and deciding you will pursue them with your life is casting a vision. These are all wonderful, admirable visions for one’s life. But these things won’t just happen. That’s not how the world works. You’re going to have to work for them and you cannot work aimlessly. You’re going to need a plan.

Make A Plan

Many well-meaning Christians act as if planning is somehow insulting to the Holy Spirit, as if planning displays a lack of faith in what He can do. But anyone who has actively moved toward a vision knows that apart from the Lord we can do nothing (John 15:3-5)

Eric Mason, Manhood Restored

I am by nature, not a good planner. I’m extremely extroverted, and open, and grew up loving to be spontaneous. When I was younger, I thought it was better and more exciting to go with the flow, and rolled my eyes at people who made plans. I thought they were boring. I thought they were wasting their time. I thought it was possible to live a perfectly happy life just by accepting it as it came to you. I was wrong. A happy-go-lucky lifestyle is fit for toddlers. It is, however, foolish and irresponsible for adults, particularly for grown men. The sad part about this, for me at least, is I have benefited greatly from making plans and sticking to them, but still fall short in creating new ones.

When I was in college and began to take my faith seriously, I fell in love with scripture and wanted to read the entire Bible. I told my pastor I was struggling in my attempt to go cover to cover. He advised me to find a different way to read it and try cover-to-cover again in a few years. So, I made a plan. I categorized the books of the Bible into groups such as the gospels, major prophets, minor prophets, Paul’s epistles, etc, until every book was listed in a category. I read every book in every category and stuck to my plan diligently and within a year and a half finished my first reading of the whole Bible. It was an amazing feeling. One because I was now more acquainted with scripture and two, because I made a plan, stuck to it, and reaped the benefits.

Around this same time, after years of pointless dating, I wanted a relationship that would lead to marriage. That was the vision. To see this through, I needed to changed. I needed to grow up. I had to mature in ways that both visible and invisible.I made plans and made some changes. I would continue my scripture reading, prayer routine, and ministry work. That would help with the invisible. For the visible, I changed the way I dressed. I still wore what I wanted to wear, but upgraded a bit. Graphic t-shirts were replaced with Henley’s and button-downs. Cargo shorts and worn-out pants were replaced with Chinos and proper-fitting jeans. I decided my car would always be clean and smell good so that if I was ever fortunate enough to have a single lady in the car she would notice, and see me as a man who had his life together. I worked on my manners and social skills. If I could hold the door open for anyone, I did. If someone needed a tire changed or a jumpstart and I could help, I did. I made sure to acknowledge everyone in the room and make them the center of my attention. I made dinner and hosted friends. Also, I stopped settling for buzz cuts and decided to get proper haircuts and i exercised regularly. I stuck to these practices and my plan for becoming more mature for years and it paid off. When my now wife and I started dating, it was easy to present the best version of myself because I had already been practicing being the best version of myself. My wife even told me somewhere along the way that what attracted her to me were all the things I just mentioned. In her eyes, I was a man amongst a bunch of guys.

I must admit that over the years, I have not made or kept plans with quite as much vigor. I could list lots of reasons or excuses, but the underlying truth is I have simply been too passive. Don’t get me wrong, I have a wonderful life. I have a supportive and beautiful wife who is amazing with our two children. But I casually dislike my job, or at least know on some level I’d like to do something else. My wife longs to quit her job. We are not currently part of a church community which I strongly desire, and I want to own more land. These things won’t just happen. Right now, I have a dimly cast vision and no concrete plans on how to see these visions come to fruition. I do, however, have all the motivation and hope a man needs.

My daughter, Delaney, Wife Sidney, myself, and my son, Emerson

My wife, kids, home, and job could all be used as excuses for why I’m too busy and remain passive. That is exactly backward. They are the very reason and motivation for actively engaging in life, casting a true vision, and making plans. The hope I have in executing these plans rests in Jesus, the ultimate vision caster and master planner.

“In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. The same was in the beginning with God. All things were made by him; and without him was not any thing made that was made. In him was life; and the life was the light of men. And the light shineth in darkness; and the darkness comprehended it not.”

‭‭John‬ ‭1‬:‭1‬-‭5‬ ‭KJV‬‬

In the beginning, Jesus, with a vision none of us could comprehend, spoke and His plans for creation were set forth. Of course, through our sins, His original plans were thwarted. Yet God in love, grace, mercy, and might went forward with a new plan of redemption that will never be undone. The Word became flesh, lived a sinless life, was killed though innocent, and still conquered death so that we who believe in Him may have everlasting life.

What about when life happens and God changes your plans?

Look, plans change. Sometimes things change so much the the vision you cast is thrown out with the plans. The encouragement I would offer here is that you’ve cast a vision before, you’ve made plans before. Now just do it again. If you can develop discipline and resilience to the challenges that will inevitably come, you can move forward knowing God is still there directing your steps. Sometimes when tragedy strikes, you will want to curl up in a ball and cry. And you might need to for a moment, or a day, a week or a month. But eventually, you’re going to need to keep going. Practice casting small visions, making small plans and working towards your vision. The practice will help you develop the discipline and initiative it takes to do such things, so that when tough times come, you have your practice and discipline to fall back on.

I want to ask all of you to pray for me. Pray that I will cast a Christ-centered vision, make some plans, and move on from my passive way.

If you need an idea for one way to stop being passive, will now give my obligatory recommendation of a digital detox. Many of us (myself included) passively engage with our digital devices. By actively limiting your use of digital technology you become more aware of how passive you are in other aspects of life and can work towards becoming intentional.

Benediction

In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit,

Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy upon us, we sinners. Amen

Thank you for reading! Do your best to disconnect from the artificial, and connect with others.

And as always,

Keep thy head cool and thine eyes true.

Howard Pyle, Man of Iron

Scripture of the Week

“A man's heart deviseth his way: But the LORD directeth his steps.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭16‬:‭9‬ ‭KJV‬‬

Word of the Week

(adjective) Peremptory- insisting on immediate attention or obedience.

Example: “Get down from there” was the father’s peremptory response seeing his young child too high up the ladder.

Music of the Week

Duneagle- John Lunn, The Chamber Orchestra of London.