30 Day Digital Detox Results and Reflections.

I put a lot of work into my yard during this detox and I think it showed.

At the end of April, I read a great essay from School of the Unconformed that prompted readers to participate in a 30-day digital detox for the month of May. After reading the guidelines and goals I thought “I can do this, and it sounds worthwhile”. Then I got a text from my brother who I knew had also read the essay asking “Are you up for the 30-day digital detox?” Already knowing he was on board I decided on the spot that I too was in! Knowing he would be participating as well made the decision easier. He and I would be able to hold each other accountable by checking in with one another and knowing someone else would be able to relate to the struggles that would come was comforting. So, I wrote out the guidelines and goals for reference, and on May 1st, the digital detox was on.

My rules were absolutely no Facebook or Instagram for any reason. I was allowing myself to use Substack in the evenings after my daughter was put to bed which usually lasted no longer than 45 minutes and didn’t happen each night. On the nights I was not on substack I was reading either Scripture or my book for the month, or talking with my wife. As far as just using the phone in general, I did keep it on me at almost all times while at work because my wife is now 36 weeks pregnant and I wanted to be available to her should she need me for any reason. But as soon as I got home, the phone was put in a specific spot, and I was not allowed to look at it for the rest of the evening. I was not perfect at this. But I would say I was able to follow that rule 95% of the time so in my mind was a success. What was not a success was trying to refrain from Spotify. Before you judge, let me explain.

At the beginning of the month, I told myself that along with staying off of social media, I would also go without Spotify and just listen to the radio. This was by far the biggest challenge. Not only because I am passionate about music, but because of my job. My job requires me to drive for about 30 hours a week. 30 hours a week of just regular radio in south Georgia was simply awful. I made it two weeks before I finally decided that I was going to allow myself to use Spotify for music and podcasts while working. When I was sticking to the radio I found myself getting annoyed with people at work very quickly and that just was not productive or good for anyone. But there were good moments. I spent about a week just working in silence and that was far better than the radio. I found myself remembering things I should be praying about. Things I should be more grateful for. I would randomly think of songs I had not heard in years and they would then be stuck in my head. I found myself whistling more and creating melodies like that that I then played on my guitar. I found that in boredom and silence my imagination and creativity were jolted. I have decided to incorporate more Work-in-Silence days into my schedule. I am going to make it a weekly routine where one day each week I just ride around with nothing but my thoughts.

I did loads of yard work in silence which was something I was not used to. Cutting the grass, weed-eating, and pressure washing all went by much quicker with no distractions from music or podcasts and I was able to enjoy and appreciate the work being done more fully. One evening I needed to water the lawn because we hadn’t had enough rain that week so I just sat outside with my feet in the grass and adjusted the sprinklers from time to time. I was able to see some deer and an owl just because I was sitting in the yard being present.

This does not technically count as something I accomplished in the month of May, but some wildflowers and marigolds I planted at the end of March have started to bloom and are quite beautiful. I did spend time pulling out weeds that had grown around them so in that way I did create a more beautiful space in the yard in a spot my wife and I have recently determined will be a prayer garden.

The most productive area for me was the amount of reading I was able to get done. I read the Book of Job, and the Book of Acts and in doing so completed my reading of the ESV translation of the Bible. This is the second full translation of Scripture I have been able to complete and it felt like a big accomplishment personally. My next goal is to read the KJV translation from cover to cover. I have no idea how long that will take with two young babies in the house but I will make it happen. I also read a book by the Pastor Matt Chandler of the Village Church in Dallas, Texas called The Explicit Gospel which was a good read. It was both straightforward and thoughtful and gave me some really cool ways to think through Christ’s Gospel. The cool part about getting all of this reading down was how it highlighted how productive I can be in just the morning by denying myself my phone.

If there is one thing I am very disciplined with, it’s my morning routine. I wake up early each morning, make a healthy breakfast, have coffee, read scripture and pray. Of course, with the baby, I am required to be flexible but for the most part, this is my routine each morning. However, over the years I have listened to music or podcasts while cooking and eating, and sometimes before or after reading and praying, I would get distracted by social media. By cutting out the use of my phone during this time, I found my routine so much more fulfilling. I got some much more reading and prayer in before work or watching my daughter and it has had a profound impact on how I feel during the day. Knowing that I was able to reflect on God’s word and pray and meditate on those prayers kept me more connected to those things throughout the day. This is one change made during this detox I will be holding onto.

During this time I would periodically check in with my brother to see how he was doing. To his credit, he had already been staying off of social media. One evening he sent me a text telling me he had deleted all his social media accounts and was never going back. I thought about that, made my own plans to save any information from my social media accounts I wanted to say, and as of a few days ago, I followed along and also deleted my social media accounts except for Substack. I can already tell I made a good decision. My digital detox was already helping me to not just look at my phone as much and now that has just gotten better. I feel no need or want to get on Instagram or Facebook. I’m simply done with them.

Okay, so what else did I accomplish? I did visit with a family member I hadn’t seen in a while. I reached out to two neighbors and had very nice face-to-face conversations. I cooked one new meal, and I left my phone at home while my family ran errands for the afternoon. I was not able to make the two-hour walk happen and I didn’t engage in a new physical activity. As a married man with a pregnant wife, a 1-year-old, and a full-time job I just simply could not find two hours to myself, time to create something beautiful, or try a new physical activity. But I don’t feel too bad about those failures and here’s why. I am so incredibly blessed to have a beautiful wife, a sweet baby girl, and a son who will be here any day now. I have a good job that I enjoy and excel at that helps me to provide for them. So maybe I don’t have two hours to myself. Maybe I don't have time these days to walk for two hours, try a new physical activity, or create something beautiful. But I do have a beautiful young family who loves me and needs me. And this Digital Detox helped to get off social media, and really break bad digital habits I didn’t know I had. One day, when the kids are older I’ll have two hours to myself. I’ll have time to try a new activity and I’ll have time to build. But right now, I am going to appreciate the life I have without feeling I need to capture it for social media. I’m going to be present with my family and love every challenging minute of it. I may not have checked all the boxes for this challenge, but it was far from a failure.